


When it Rains At Night

by yannan



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Heavy Angst, M/M, Self-Harm, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, wooseok is depressed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2018-09-17
Packaged: 2019-07-13 08:32:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16014206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yannan/pseuds/yannan
Summary: When it rains, nobody can see him through the thick drops, nobody can see his silhouette sneaking away.





	When it Rains At Night

**Author's Note:**

> \- major trigger warning !!

Wooseok is sitting in Hwitaek’s lap, sitting on a single seat together. Yanan is sitting in a similar position on Changgu in the chair across from them, and the other boys are on the couch or floor together.

They all kind of met by accident, Wooseok was a lost freshman looking for the library when Hwitaek saved him, Hwitaek introduced him to Jinho and Changgu, and Changgu introduced him to Shinwon and Hongseok. Wooseok introduced them to Yanan and Yuto, but Changgu instantly claimed Yanan for himself, who introduced them all to Hyunggu and his boyfriend Hyojong.

They all had different majors, though some shared some classes. For example, Hyunggu and Hyojong both shared a dance class, but Hyunggu was majoring in choreography whereas Hyojong was majoring in the performing arts.

Wooseok leans closer to his boyfriend, resting his head against the elder’s shoulder. He closes his eyes, listening to everyone else talk.

“Are you tired, baby?” Hwitaek whispers, loud enough for him only. Wooseok nods, but Hwitaek knows it’s not sleep-tired. He rubs the boy’s back, “Want to go back to my dorm and we can watch movies and have snacks?”

Wooseok shakes his head, before sitting up again, looking at their friends before back to Hwitaek, “No, it’s alright. We’re having fun with everyone, it’s happy.” He says these words mostly to assure himself, smiling softly at the other.

The elder doesn’t smile back, he lifts a hand to cradle Wooseok’s cheek, “We can be happy without so much interaction, baby, but if you’d like to stay then that’s fine too.” Now he smiles, soft and sweet, because he’s always been sweet with Wooseok.

Sometimes Wooseok doesn’t think he deserves it. 

The younger cuddles close again, just needing the affection from his boyfriend, because when his arms are around him he doesn’t feel so sad and the bad thoughts usually go away.

Usually go away.

 

Wooseok sits on the shower floor in his dorm, Yuto is staying over with his girlfriend, so he’s alone again. He can’t tell if it’s tears or drops of water falling down his face, at some point they all just mix together. 

He scratches at his arms, blunt nails just sharp enough to tear the skin. He keeps scratching, the skin on his wrist goes red, and he keeps going until the blood drips down into the water. It stains the water pink, before being washed down the drain.

Drops fall, slowly, steadily, dripping from the scratches on his skin.

He sits there for another hour, letting the water clean out the stinging sore, before getting out.

He dries off and gets dressed in day clothes, it’s four in the morning anyway, so it’s not like he’ll be getting to bed. He sighs, grabbing a few bandaids from his desk. They have little frogs and bears on them, cute and sweet. Hwitaek bought them for him last week, but he said he wanted Wooseok to tell him everytime he used a bandaid.

So after putting three on his wrist, he picks up his phone and texts his boyfriend, a simple “i had to use a bandaid, it’s okay though dw, just got a scratch” before setting it back down.

He lays on his bed, thinking, listening.

Does he really deserve somebody as perfect as Hwitaek, someone who knows how depressed he is, yet supports him and stays with him. Somebody who never forced him to have sex or do anything serious, actually Wooseok was the one that insisted they fuck.

He sighs, sitting up and picking up his phone again. Hwitaek hasn’t read his message, which means he’s asleep, which is good. He types out another text, “I love you so much, thank you for everything, you make me so happy. I wish I could do the same”

He tosses his phone onto the bed, before pulling his jacket on and leaving the dormitory. It’s raining and dark in the early morning, he can barely see two feet ahead of himself, but after two years here, he knows where he’s going.

He finds the gymnasium easily enough, once inside the lights, he can see fine.

He walks around all the equipment, to the back where the pool is.

It’s humid inside the pool area, and it smells strongly of chlorine. Wooseok has never actually swam in it, considering he can’t swim.

He hums, because little does he know Hwitaek has seen his message and woken up their entire friend group. 

Wooseok walks to the deep end, it’s 13 feet deep, and there’s no ladder. He steps closer to the edge, smelling the chemical water, it actually has an appealing scent.

And as if the scent was what pulled him in, Wooseok steps off the edge. The water is warm and heavy. He sinks down to the bottom, the lights reflect off the surface in a beautiful way, his vision is blurry though.

His scratches burn under the bandaids, but he just lets his arms float above his head, as if they’re trying to reach for the oxygen his lungs so desperately need.

Bubbles float out of his mouth one last time, before his lungs start to burn, his heart rate increases, and his vision goes dark around the edges.

He doesn’t bother to even try to swim up, letting his body go limp, his eyes closing. The pretty reflection is the last thing he sees really.

But it’s almost as if Hwitaek knew. As if he knew exactly what Woiseok was thinking. He rubs into the gymnasium, to the pool area.

He looks around, there’s no sign of Wooseok here, until his eyes land on a dark blob under the water across the pool.

He runs along, tossing his jacket and phone to the floor without care, his heart is racing a million beats a minute.

He dives in to the water, swimming down. His own lungs burn as he wraps an arm around his boyfriend, swimming up. 

He pulls them both up, and Hongseok, who followed Hwitaek here, grabs Wooseok’s unmoving body and pulls him up. Hwitaek pulls himself up and looks at his boyfriend.

He looks so at peace, so calm, whereas Hwitaek is the opposite. Usually it’s the other way around.

Hongseok picks up Hwitaek’s phone and calls 119, as the elder starts doing the CPR basics.

He can’t hear a heart beat, but blames it on the water in his ears. He can’t feel any air from Wooseok’s mouth, but blames it on the humidity. 

Sirens can be heard in the distance, drawing near quickly. 

Hwitaek feels years falling down his face, but he assumes it’s just water from the pool still dripping from his hair.

Within minutes, paramedics are hoisting the drenched body of Wooseok on to a gurney, while another puts a thick blanket around Hwitaek’s shoulders.

He wants to get in the ambulance with Wooseok, but he’s not allowed. He gets piled into a different ambulance with Hongseok and Jinho, following behind.

Like the thought of being with Wooseok allures him, Hwitaek can only ask about him. He looks to the paramedic beside him, “All I want to know is if he’s alive. I won’t scream or deny it, just... tell me if i was too late.”

He should have stayed with Wooseok tonight, should have read his message sooner, should have assured him that he is his happiness sooner.

Before the paramedic can answer, there’s a radio in, “CPR failed, Code Blue called off.” And that’s all that really matters.

Hwitaek can’t hear anything else. Because that means it’s not a medical emergency anymore, that means Wooseok isn’t alive. That means it’s over. 

It’s over.


End file.
